Note to discerning Beachys:

I give the credit for this parable to a Discerning Beachy Reader, who Emailed a story for submission. After taking editorial liberties, I have offered it to the Beachy Complex Community for thier enjoyment.

This post is a work of fiction, all resemblance to actual persons living or dead is entirely concidental. (For the most part.)

And he spake unto them a parable, saying, “In the days of Bushus, King of Washington, at a certain Bible school, located in the very sticks of Beachydom, there were ten virgins. Now some of these were guys, and some of them were girls, but they were all good Beachy’s, all single and all at Bible school. And as has been noted, they were all virgins, which is always a good thing when you are single, a Beachy and at Bible School. And five of these were wise and five were foolish.

And the wise virgins paid attention to their teacher’s and took notes, yea, and were reverent in church, neither passed notes, nor texted members of the opposite sex, nor even acted in manners which might be called flirtatious. But they applied themselves unto their studies, until their eyes grew dim, and they slumbered and slept.

And the foolish virgins acted foolishly, for they winked at members of the opposite sex, and didst sent texts of spurious nature thereunto. And behold, they passed notes in class, and paid no attention unto their teachers, but rather unto the cute individual beside whom they sat. And in the dorms they were frivolous, yea, even unto playing Games of Chance, and Card Games, such as Rook, and every good Beachy knows that abstinence from Rook-playing is a cardinal mark of conservatism. And they gossiped and giggled until the late watches of the night, and finally, exhausted from frivolity, they slumbered and slept.

And at the crack of dawn, the bells rang, and the cry went forth, Behold, the finals cometh! Go ye forth and take them.

And the foolish virgins begged of the wise saying, Give us of your notes! (For they had no notes to speak of, except those of flirtatious nature, which, although they make awesome bedtime reading, are not exactly the most efficacious resources when it comes to test-taking) And the wise virgins answered, Are you nuts? We need these notes for last-minute cramming, lest we fail along with you. Go ye and make photocopies of someone else’s notes.

And even as the photocopier warmed up, the time for finals came.

And the foolish virgins cried unto the teacher, after that they had bombed their exams. “Please, sir, pass us, for we need the credits badly.” And the teacher said, “I will not. For you had no clue what we studied in this class, as your final exams have demonstrated.” And they went home in disgrace.

And it came to pass that the foolish virgins went from that place and took their habits with them. And some of them continue in the same paths unto this day. But some of the foolish virgins repented and became responsible, even to the point of marrying and growing beards.

IMPORTANT NOTE: The foolish virgins who repented and grew beards were guys.